Oh, no!

It seems I forgot about my blog. Again!

I can only apologise. That is, if there's anybody out there reading it. I haven't been well. I have been sick for about a month. A chest infection that just will not go away. I've had about 6 doses of anti-biotics. It's crazy.

I don't know why I'm telling you this. It's not important. But as well as that, I've been busy. Re-focusing on my life and where I'd like it to go to. I seem to do this every September. It's rather odd. I know most people do it around their birthday, or so I'm told, but no, not me. I guess I have to be a little different and do it earlier. Quite a few months earlier.

I am looking at other avenues to pursue. A different career path, a different job, a different city. Possibly, even a different country. I am not yet decided, though I have a couple of options to sit and think about.

I am focusing on my writing, as that is what I'd like to do. I purchased a little A5 booklet about 2 months ago and now I seem to carry it with me wherever I go. Every day, pretty much. And I'll jot something in there if I get the chance. Lately it's been poetry and short stories. In the past week I've written 3 short stories and a poem.

I have about 7 poems all up that I've written and if you like, you're welcome to read an excert from one. I don't feel that it's any good, but I know it rhymes. Haha!

This one is the opening paragraph from 'Life's Ambition'...

My mind is blank, or so it seems,
Only coming alive within my dreams.
It twists and turns and weaves its way,
Navigating its way to a brand new day.
My deepest thoughts, my biggest fears,
Contained within for all these years.
You're not allowed inside; I won't let you see,
Its access restricted, allowed only by me.
However please be patient and give it time,
Certain things I will share from within my mind.
Some thoughts are dark, some thoughts are deep,
If they stay inside, they're mine to keep.
If I let them out, if I dare to be daring,
My inner self with you I'll be sharing.
I'll let you see what goes on inside,
What makes me laugh, what makes me cry.
What sometimes brings me to my knees,
The pain inside, it makes me weep.
As I grasp for the strength to stand back up,
Though sometimes I find that it's not enough.
I search for courage in things that I have,
Disconnecting from those in which I lack.

In the words of Eminem....

... Guess who's back?

If you answered 'You', then yes, you are correct!

It seems I lost my mojo. My muse. My reason for writing.

I also lost my password.

Oh, and forgot what my sign in was for my google account - which is, of course, connected to signing in on my blog.

Well, it seems I've remembered. I've regained my confidence, my thoughts and my voice. And it seems, my fingers can't keep up on this keyboard fast enough. They are tap, tap, tapping away as they try and maintain the speed at which my brain it moving it. They are not succeeding. I keep making mistakes and wasting time by pressing the <--- button. I've used it about 10 times already, but I've been kind enough to clear the mistakes for you. Heaven forbid, I should subject you to my grammar.

This blog will take a different turn now though.

You see, I just spent about 10 minutes trying to think of a new name for a blog -

finding my voice
writing right
what I can't say

To name a few, but alas, these were all taken. So I've decided just to stick with my original blog name... the 'moviemerlin' one, only give it a bit of a make over. A shake-up. A change.

I am no longer an 'autograzzi'. I don't do the celebrity spotting anymore. Living in Brisbane, there's not really anyone I see (though, I am hoping to find Tim McGraw come September!). So now, the blog will just be about anything. And everything. My thoughts, my musings, my life, my rants - as the keys I tap become words and the words become sentences, this will become my blog.

My life is taking a change, or at least, I hope it is. I've now decided what I'd like to do and where I'd like to be, and I'm hoping with all hope, that I'll get there. My fate is to be a writer, that much I know... I just have to be willing to take a few steps to get there.

So, please, come take a walk me. Follow me on this journey. Maybe you'll laugh. Maybe you'll cry. Maybe you'll get to the end of a post and wish you could get that 3 minutes of your life back. But if you can't do that, then I ask only this of you...

Please, forgive me for taking 2 years to get back to you. You sure were missed!